GOOD DAY. This is KIRAN R PAWAR is This right time to talk to you? As you
are aware I am working with LIC, LIC is conducting a customer satisfaction
sarway. The corporation wants to know your views on Life Insurance
Mr. ________I want to meet you for about 15; minuets. Would you prefer That of come at 10am Saturday or nest day Sunday be more suitable? (your view :s are Important to us)
Thanking you
You finical friends
Kiran R. Pawar
And so began my autopsy of the ill-fated letter which dared to seek my mailbox with all its lacunae. And as if he were standing here in front of me, my friend starts asking -
Is this a good time to talk to you?
NO. Why is he going on?
As you are aware, I am working for LIC?
As YOU are obviously unaware, this is the first time I’m talking to you, so I’m not aware. Ok, now I’m aware. Now what?
The corporation wants to know your views on Life Insurance Mr.
What? Is this an interrogation, mister? Or is it like Mr._________, I want to meet you for 15; meet you for 15? You want 15 from me? 15 what? *Flabbergasted* Oh minuets? You want to meet me for 15 minuets? 15 dances and that too old style? Crazy hua kya? I’m no ‘Writh’ik Roshan, mind you.
Would you prefer that?
Prefer what? The dance?
Would you prefer that of come at 10am Saturday?
Any suggestions?
Or nest day Sunday be more suitable?
I thought Sunday was a rest day. Nest Day? What do we do? Go and nest? Or is it that on a “nest day be more suitable”, and other days be less suitable? Suitable for what? Nesting? Huh? And in the bracket he writes – your view :s are important to us. I have half a hunch the ‘:’ implies another meaning. Which view is he talking about? Sunday? Nesting? View? Whew!!!
You finical friends – Kiran R Pawar
Friends? I assume that the r is “or”. Which leads me to believe that there are two of them, both finical and intending to maintain an air of mystery. Oooh!!! Super. But then, who is the “this” pointer when they say in the first line “this is Kiran (or) Pawar”
And even though I spellcheck all the posts and comments for the professor, she does have an other side - she won this contest with this gem of an entry, you see. So as soon as I received this email, I sent it to her. Sometimes, it helps to know you have competition around.
5 comments:
If only you had written "I am a sticker"... sigh!
Btw, isn't it "writhe"ik Roshan? (Just an attempt at reverse spellchecking, that's all). And yes, that's a fantastic name!
Iam att los off wrods....Uu no I amm aa Mann of phew!!!!
Forgive me for my sin, brohter!!!
You wish, Shru, don't you? :D
It is writhe indeed, but when used as a part of a name, it loses its 'e'. What do they call it - some license, no? ;)
Goks, my friend, forgiven. :D
Lol, Viky!!! I've been reading your comments on Shruthi's blog from ages but it never struck me to read from your blog as well. My first visit here and man, you're good!!! You made me laugh out loud with the first post I read, that too right in the middle of the working day.
Anyway, I do identify with you here - have had my hackles raised against such letters and emails myself but some of them still have my sympathies. Am sure they did not get all the facilities we did to read the amount we did; only a very basic level of education compounded with a even more basic understanding of the English language. :-)I'd like it better if they wrote in a language they were comfortable with, maybe Hindi or whatever.
Sachin, Agreed that they may have a basic level of understanding/education, there is not much we can do when total strangers write such mails. They are at best, classic entries for contests.
But let me tell you, had I known the person even a wee bit, I would have sent him the same mail with corrections in red!!!
And yes, Welcome!!!
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